Well MASSES, (I use that term loosely for the people who read my blog, I know its more like people I can count on one hand. I just came up with it. I think it is positive and you know kinda like if you build it they will comish!!!) we have made it to the New Year!! And like many others, I am so happy all this holiday hub-bub is over, but I am also sad because all the holiday hub-bub is no longer around to provide a cloak to my general laziness and procrastination at work. I will now actually have to start and finish all the work that rolled through here the last month or so! I know its sad, but its me!
The New Year is here and now its time to get it right, get it tight!! I didn’t at all do any survey or year in review blog this time around for 2007. I think its because I have realized that 2007 signals an end for me. There is now a chapter in my life that I have titled DETOUR but it’s also known as my married life. I feel like now I am in the house and he is married I can CLOSE this chapter of my life and kinda pretend like it never happened. It’s funny but where I am right now is where I expected to be as a little girl, not married with children. Living single and what I would like to say is moderately successful. You know for me success is like Jell-O there is always room for more.
Anyway 2007 was hard for me. I went through some changes and I’m still not sure why, but I have been very happy yet there were times, nothing extended, where I felt like I had lost the person I cared about most in a deadly accident! I realize now that it was me mourning a loss. I think we often don’t realize that sometimes with rebirth comes death. I mean if you are being reborn then something has to happen to who you were before. That person should die if you are really being reborn. And we know no matter what death still stings and especially if it was a part of you good or bad. Anyway she’s dead….I think or maybe I am borderline schizophrenic and she is just sleep. Any which way I feel like ’08 is the year many of us will “GET IT STRAIGHT”
Its funny that came from a random text from a random guy that I met in NOLA, who was like “**HOLIDAY WELL WISH* lets get it str8 in 08” So simple, but since I received that text on Christmas afternoon its been in the back of my head, lets get it straight in ’08.
I already had planned on getting it straight. I have come full circle since my marriage almost 7 years ago. I am who I want to be, free to grow and change and I am growing and changing as we speak. I will be 35 this year and I want to be debt free and really start making this money(my money) start working for me, so I can retire from working for the man and actually work for myself and live comfortably at a fairly young age.
I have reached all my post divorce goals and now my goal is to make my house a home. Realistically I think that will take me a few more years, but I am on the right track. I am working on knowing exactly who I am and sometimes that is hard, because you have to really answer questions that are uncomfortable to get to your core. There are people who are NEVER honest with themselves which is a very sad thing when I think about it, because if you can’t be honest with YOU who can YOU be honest with? Most certainly not with me, if you lie to yourself you will lie to ANYONE including the Lord God Jehovah himself!
I hope in ’08 this country will get itself straight and elect someone who at least feigns some kind of feeling for the real America (as opposed to the Rich America)! I know really its all the same but I like presidents who pretend to care about me while getting rich! You know to be really black, I wish this country would get it straight and elect Barack as Democratic nominee and then President of the United States or at the least the Vice President ( I do think Hill will prob pick him if she gets it! I mean what better insurance against assassination than a black VP?), not that I believe that will get the country straight, especially after 8 years of all this tom foolery in office.
It’s crazy because this presidency has convinced me MORE than ever we are truly in the LAST days (ok I hope you know I mean days metaphorically...don't sip that purple kool-aid just yet.) with the beginnings of religion and politics starting to meld into one. It’s crazy the rising political power of the evangelicals is not an accident it is biblical. If you know your bible then you already know where this is ALL going.
I hope in 08 the Spears family will get it straight, I am so embarrassed that this country is on pins and needles reporting on the coming and goings and baby havings of trailer park trash!! I mean couldn’t we have just remade the Beverly Hillbillies?
I hope in 08 that NO MORE RAPPERS with talent die. I mean why it that the most talented rappers are dying? I mean if Souljaboy was gone tomorrow, sure I’d be sad that he could neva Superman that ho again, but I think the world wouldn’t be robbed of his genius ( which I think will be Souljababy!! Think about it first we had Souljaboy, then Souljagirl, its only logical the next step of musical genius that is Souljaboy would be Souljababy!)
Speaking of rappers, I hope TI can get it straight with TIP and they both can come out of the house and hopefully visit me!!
I also hope in 08 that I will be able to take my mom to NYC for her 55th birthday!!
I really don’t do resolutions. I am a goal maker and the thing about goals is sometimes they span several years. I like goals better anyway it seems like you keep them they never just fall away like resolutions to be found on the next New Year’s Eve.
I really am going to try to not only GET IT STR8 in 08 as my friend urged me in the obviously blindly sent holiday text!! I am going to try to keep it straight. Just for the record I am going to try to get my self into more of a routine and habit of being a person, which means normal routine of housekeeping, working, living, and loving. I will continue, as I do each year, to try to be less extreme. I would love to have like a schedule but I think its hard for me because nothing demands my time (husband and kids) , so letting things slip into they do demand my time is very easy.
As I approach 35, I think I need some tweaking and I need good honest reflections when I am tweaking. Its nothing like someone to tell you hey I think you are tripping or girl nothing has changed the old way was just fine for you. Or he is crazy or my favorite phrase PHUCK THAT NICCA!! I know that is wrong on so many levels, but oh so right and so necessary on a few occasions!! BELIEVE ME!
Anyway, I hope your’08 is starting out as wonderfully as you hope. Mine seems to be ok. I plan on being more regular on here, but give me a chance to work into a routine for myself before you just hold my feet to the fire on that promise. I do have a list of shyt I want to talk about and hopefully I will be able to get it out to you, the masses, on the regular. Until you read again.